An Intimate Exercise For Lovers

In her address before the Mind Control group, Mrs. Simonton spoke of the many stresses in life which, if not handled properly, can lead to illness.

“It is so uncommon in our patients for them to have a good marriage,” she said. “When there is a good marriage wkh a cancer patient, it is one of the greatest things we have to work with, one of the greatest reasons for them to stay alive.”

What makes a good marriage?

My own marriage to Paula is an extraordinarily good one—it has been rich and interesting for thirty-six years, but I do not thoroughly understand why.

Perhaps not thoroughly understanding is part of what makes it good. I say this so you will understand that I have no firsthand experience with unhappy marriage and am therefore no expert on how to rescue one —or whether one should be rescued—when it is in deep trouble.

However, I do know a few ways of enriching and improving a marriage when both husband and wife want this to happen.

You might expect me to speak first of sex, since many believe it to be the underpinning of a good mar- riage. I see it more as a result of a good marriage and will discuss it later.

The best foundation for a marriage, I believe, is intimacy—not an invasion-of-privacy kind of intimacy, but the sort that comes from deep understanding and acceptance.

We have spoken about the lifting joy toward the end of the Mind Con- trol course.

Something else occurs, too. It is more subtle but deeply felt. The students, moments away from graduation, feel that they are in intimate, almost loving touch with each other.

They came as strangers whose paths might otherwise never have crossed, and they will soon leave to live out their individual destinies. Yet this feeling of connection with one another will easily be reawakened should they meet again. This is widely believed to stem from the fact that they have been through an intense, once-in-a-lifetime experience together. Soldiers often feel this way after they have shared the intense experiences of war. So too would any group of strangers who found themselves trapped together for an afternoon in an elevator. This is only part of the explanation, not even the larger part of it. It is the part most often seized upon because it can be easily grasped.

Something else happens, which I shall try to explain.

During deep and prolonged meditation, connections are made—minds are sensitively receptive and are gently touched by other minds in ways otherwise familiar only to those who have lived full lifetimes together. Most instant intimacies are superficial and false and leave us feeling a little uncomfortable. They last only briefly. Not this experience; it is on a durable psychic level.

Because it is a subde feeling rather than an overwhelming one, do not be surprised if you heard nothing of it from any Mind Control graduate you may have met Mention it and that person will probably say, “Oh, yes. We all feh it. It was beautiful!”

This is a sort of by-product of Mind Control training. The course is not specifically designed to achieve it. However (this is the strange suggestion I mentioned) it is possible to use what both of you, as husband and wife, have already learned about Mind Control to deliberately create a very comfortable intimacy that only years of living together could otherwise achieve.

The result will be stronger and deeper than the one our students experience in classes.

Here is what to do:

1. Select a place where you both feel happiest, most relaxed. It might be a place where you vacationed together, any place with especially pleasant memories you share.

It can even be a place neither of you has ever seen—you can create it together. Do not, however, select a place where only one of you has been.

This will skew the symmetry of the experience and reduce the sense of sharing.

2. Sit comfortably, close, facing each other. Relax and let your eyes close.

3. One of you will say to the other something like this: “Fm going to count slowly from ten to one, and with each count you will feel yourself going deeper into a pleasant, meditative level of mind. Ten—nine—feel going deeper—eight—seven—six—deeper and deeper —five—four—deeper still—three—two—one. You are now relaxed, at a deep, pleasant level of mind.

With your help, I will join you there.”

4. The other will say, “I wfll count slowly from ten to one, and with each count well come closer in a deep level of mind. Ten—nine—feel going deeper with me—eight—seven—six—deeper and deeper together— five—four—deeper still and closer—three—two—one.

We are now both relaxed, at a pleasant level of mind. Let us go deeper together.”

5. The first person will say, “All right, let’s go very deep together. Let’s experience our place of relaxation together. The more we experience this, the deeper we will go. Notice the s k y . . . "

6. “Yes . . . it’s clear, with a few drifting clouds.” Each of you will slowly, spontaneously, describe the scene you are experiencing together—the temperature, the colors, the sounds, all the pleasant details.

7. When you are both at a deep level—no hurry about this—and fully experiencing your place of relax- ation, one of you will say to the other, “I want most in life to make you happy, and only then do I want to make myself happy.”

8. The other will say, “And I want most to make you happy, and only then to make myself happy.”

9. Allow a period—as long as you want—of silent communion, then awaken. For some, this period of silent communion may be experienced even more deeply by gazing into each other’s eyes. It is entirely possible for the experienced meditator to remain at Alpha or Theta with eyes open. If you are not comfortable with this, do not force it.

This is a far more powerful experience than you might imagine from just reading about it here.

The very first time you try it you will be convinced and, with variations you may develop, it may become a permanent part of your lives together.

A few words of caution: The beauty of this experience will be completely lost if it is misused.

If one of the 2 persons involved does not understand the purpose of it and fully agree with that purpose, the resulting sense of intimate communion may come as a less than agreeable experience. I recommend it only for a man and woman seeking a deeper, richer, more durable commitment to each other.

Each of us has an aura which some can see as a faintly visible energy field surrounding the body. We can be trained to see this aura. In fact as another byproduct of Mind Control training, many of our graduates report they see their own and others’ auras.

Each is as distinctive as a fingerprint When people are physically close, their energy fields overlap. Their shape, their intensity, their color, their vibrations change. This happens in crowded theaters and buses as well as in beds with two. The more frequent the contact the more durable is the change in the auras.

In the case of husband and wife this change is a good one, because their auras become more complementary. Prolonged physical separation will reverse the process, which, needless to say, is not good for the compatibility of the marriage. Physical closeness is essential. I recommend double beds.

Now for sex: Sex is not one experience. There is an entire spectrum of possibilities. I am not speaking of techniques or positions; I mean experiences—qualities of experience at different depths and intensities. There is as wide a range of possibilities as there is between kicks and lasting joy.

Too many couples read how-to-do-rt sex manuals and, with a certain perfection of technique, think they are living a good sex life. To deliberate each step, with each step leading logically to the next keeps what could be a deep experience on the superficial, conscious level of Beta. More important is to flow with the experience, with the mind relaxed, at a meditative level.

Becoming psychically sensitive can enrich and improve a marriage immensely. Even without training, long and happy marriages can result in a deep psychic understanding between partners. Why wait?