Conscious Sleep

Timmern, West Germany. About 200 Margis are collected for Baba’s 3-day program in Timmern, a small village near Braunschweig where we have our local full-timer training center.

The vibration has always been high here but Baba’s presence has raised it another level altogether.

Several Dadas and Margis were enjoying the talk with Baba in His room—until a high pitched scream from the hallway disturbed us: “Baba! Baba! Baba!”

Bodhishvar from Switzerland stood up. “Baba, that’s my wife!”

Baba said:

After Bodhishvar left the room, Baba said to us:

In that moment the screaming ceased.

Afterward, I heard that Anchala not only became immediately quiet when Bodhishvar placed his thumb on her forehead, she also closed her eyes and entered a meditative state.

In the night, after all were sleeping, Ramanandaji called me and another Dada to Baba’s room. Just as He was falling asleep we started to massage Him. We were silent, deeply enjoying an experience which transcends description. After about two hours the other Dada left me alone with Baba.

At one point, when Baba had been snoring continuously (it was more of a soft purr than a snore).

He suddenly broke His snore, turned toward me and said, “What time is it?”

“3:30, Baba.”

“Accha,” He said, and immediately started snoring again.

It seems, I thought, that only Baba’s body is sleeping, while His mind is fully conscious.

I continued the massage, thinking about this. About twenty minutes later, just as I was thinking. Is His mind really a wake? I wish He

would give me some confirmation…, He again suddenly broke His snore, turned toward me, and said. “Who’s there?”

I smiled, saying, “Dharmavedananda, Baba.” “Accha,” He said.

His eyes twinkled at me as He chuckled softly. Within a moment He returned to His snoring. Accha, I thought.

[Author’s note: Years later. Baba’s adopted son, Kinshukji, commented to me: “Though Baba lies down and closes His eyes, He, of course, never really sleeps. Rather, whenever He appears to sleep for an extended period of time, we all become cautious. We know that He’s actually making plans. Usually, immediately after that supposed sleep. He introduces new, complex working schemes for us.”]

Devotees get their way

Everyone was talking about it: “We’ve got to convince Baba to hold DMC.” “If our devotion is strong enough. He’ll have to give DMC.” “Timmern is the best place for DMC, so why not?”

Perhaps Baba had started it all when He commented this morning, “Our Timmern program is like a mini-Fiesch.”

Whatever the cause, the excitement was so contagious that no one could avoid it.

As we came out for His evening field walk, the Margis crowded both sides of the sidewalk, leaning as close to Him as the security volunteers permitted. Like a faithful shield. I was close on His heels.

Baba was shining, immaculate in His white dress. In a clear voice that everyone could hear. He said, “It seems a fine night for DMC…” As the Margis yelled " Victory to Baba!" and other exclamations of pleasure in reaction to Baba’s words. He continued speaking in an undertone that only I could hear: “…they say.”

I turned toward the Margis, thinking to clear up the misunderstanding, but they were so excited they would not have heard me. In the same moment, I saw it was Baba’s play.

During the field walk. Baba’s mood was different than I’d ever seen. He was normally very loquacious during his walks. Tonight, for the first time. He walked in silence.

Our footsteps echoed in the air, the wind providing the only audible background to our thoughts. Without the distraction of speech, we sank deep into a spiritual mood.

Halfway through the walk, Baba pointed at some distant tall trees, colorless in the faint night light, waving like feather-fans in the wind. “See the Cosmic Wave,” He said slowly. It was His one and only sentence.

It was a unique field walk, which in a way I enjoyed more than any other.

When we returned, we entered the darshan hall. I was shocked. It was fully decorated in DMC style, with flowers, leaves, colored papers, a new colorful cover for Baba’s couch, and a special ornamental arrangement behind the couch. The Margis were singing devotional songs in full-throated fervor.

Even before the speech began, it was clear that Baba was in a special state of mind. His demeanor was unusually dignified and transcendental.

When He spoke His first words, “The subject of tonight’s discourse will be…”, I saw some of the more senior workers cast glances at each other, recognizing His common opening for a DMC speech.

The Margis shivered with excitement throughout the talk, as if an electric current was running among them. I waited for Him to give the varabhaya mudra (gesture of blessing).

He never gave it. Personally I didn’t care, but I wondered how the Margis would react. Had they not all day nurtured an expectation which He had not fulfilled?

Someone asked Him for permission to perform G uru Puja . 55 He agreed—surprisingly, as this was usually performed only after DMC.

I alone accompanied Baba downstairs to His room. When He entered the room, He said to me, “Go back up and tell everyone that tonight’s speech was not DMC, but DMS-Dharma Maha Sammelan. DMS has the same psychospiritual effect as DMC, but the varabhaya mudra is not shown.”

Just see. Guru has to follow His own system; while at the same time the devotees have their way to compel Him to follow their own desires. Of course they can only force Him up to a certain point. 56

55 Guru Puja is a mantra sung together with gestures in which the devotee offers his/her ego attachments to the guru.

56 Afterward I came to know that the last, and perhaps only time that Baba had personally held a DMS was in 1962 in Begusarai, Bihar, India. So it is clear that Baba considered this Timmern program something special. While Baba was in jail, a few avadhutas had the duty to conduct DMS. Since Baba’s passing, DMSs have been conducted only by the President.

When I went upstairs, I found all the Margis in an exuberant state, singing songs and dancing kiirtan. I climbed on the stage, took the microphone, and told everyone that I had a message from Baba. After a minute or two they calmed down and I repeated Baba’s words.

They didn’t care—no one seemed to be affected by my announcement. As soon as I finished speaking they immediately resumed their celebration— singing and dancing in spiritual ecstasy.