Instant bliss

On the Greyhound bus north. I’m traveling to Chicago. From Chicago I’ll go to India to meet Baba and try to find out whether or not I should become an acharya 13 . The Jackson center is now in the hands of another volunteer.

Chicago. One week later. My sister’s getting married this week. The ceremony will be at our house, and scores of near and distant family members are either here or on their way.

13 Acharya is the formal title of the teachers of Ananda M arga—the Dadas and Didis. Acharan means conduct. Acharya means one who teaches others through his or her personal conduct.

Yesterday, two of my cousins and I went to a public meeting of an Indian spiritual movement just starting in America. The main attraction was the mother of the guru, together with the two leading teachers of the movement— all of whom are supposed to be living saints. The guru is still in India.

The lecture had already started when we arrived. We slipped in at the back of the room, which was packed with about 200 people. The teacher who was lecturing turned toward me and stared. He kept his eyes fixed on me even while singing.

But was he really looking at me? To find out, I moved to other sides of the hall.

His eyes remained glued on me until the end—about one hour.

When the lecture finished, I was curious, to say the least. About 10 disciples were there, and it seemed all had noticed the teacher staring at me.

They also seemed to be wondering why. I requested an interview.

The teacher said to me, “We are leaving Chicago just now. Come to the airport, and we will talk there.”

Together with several disciples, my cousins and I drove to the airport. After checking in. the two teachers and the mother took me aside, alone.

“Who are you?” they asked.

“I’m going to India in a few days. I’m an Ananda Margi.”

They laughed uproariously. I was shocked.

“Oh, Ananda Marga! Violent, dangerous people! You must have nothing to do with them.”

I asked for the source of their malicious information. They spoke of various so-called scandals, but added nothing convincing.

Then they said, “Whether you believe in Ananda Marga doesn’t matter. The important fact is we give you Cosmic Knowledge instantly. You will see Light and hear Music.”

“Okay. Please give me the initiation here now,” I said.

“No, no. You meet us in Denver. We will hold big seminar there. You must join and then you receive initiation.”

“I’m going to India. Why should I change? How can I know if your Knowledge is correct or not?”

For 20 minutes they tried to persuade me.

At the end of that time, two sentences finally struck me: “We are opening doorway to God. You should at least try.” I couldn’t deny that.

I immediately canceled my flight to India, and re-booked for Denver reasoning that I could always go to India later if their promises proved empty.

In the evening, I arrived home with my cousins. They were excited and I was inspired. Everyone was pleased when they heard that I would be staying in America. Only my father was frustrated.

“How could you change your mind so easily?” he asked. “Looks like your commitment was not so deep as you made it out to be.”

As the evening wore on, a strange feeling developed. Something was wrong, though I had no idea what. “What is it, God? How am I failing You?” I thought.

Confusion overtook me. Struggling to get free, the anxiety only increased. I asked Baba and God to save me. At last I fell asleep, fully prostrate, praying for guidance.

When I woke up this morning at 6:00 a.m., I was still lying in the same position. I had been dreaming and the meaning of the dream seemed unmistakably clear. Thrilled to the bone, I jumped up to phone Dada Birendra Lai. 14

I quickly told him about yesterday’s experience. Then I told him my dream:

“Dadaji, I was in India in a room with about forty or fifty people. Baba sat in the front, facing us and speaking. We all knew that Bindeshwari was in the next room. You know, the Bindeshwari who died and was brought back to life by Baba’s touch, and who now has miraculous psychic powers.”

“Yes, yes. I know him very well.”

“Well, we could hear many persons in that room being affected by Bindeshwari’s touch on their foreheads—they were shouting, sighing, and gasping as they entered into high states of consciousness. It seemed that each of us in the room with Baba was thinking, T wish I were there',

14 At this time there were three Dadas, or acharyas, in the USA. One was a renunciate (Dada Yatishvarananda, the Dada who taught me meditation), and the other two were married. Dada Birendra Lai was a family man, employed in Chicago as an engineer. In the beginning years of Ananda M arga, all the acharyas were family people. The renunciate or monk system only came later. The two family acharyas were from the original group, and thus had long experience on the spiritual path. While maintaining his normal family responsibilities Dada Birendra also guided our Chicago meditation group. The third Dada, also married, lived and worked in Philadelphia.

as we all looked at the wall separating us from ecstasy. Only Baba was unimpressed. He turned toward the wall and yelled through it, ‘Will you little children please be quiet!’ In that same moment I woke up.

“Doesn’t it show, Dadaji, that Baba doesn’t give much importance to such psychic phenomena? Surely it would be worse than a waste of time for me to go to Denver, just running after occult experience. I think I have to give myself to God, not try to get something for myself. Isn’t is so, Dada?”

“In 1955,” Dada replied, “one devotee said to Baba, We’ve received everything by Your grace. Baba. Why don’t you give bliss to everyone in the world right now? Why wait?’ He said, T have not come to give instant bliss. That would defeat the purpose of life. Your purpose is to realize love-for- everyone-and-everything. You have to work for that.’”

I canceled the ticket for Denver and re-booked for India. 15

Don’t thank me

On the way to India I spent one day in New York City. I arranged to meet Paul at a bus stop near his house. When I stepped off the bus. he was standing about 150 meters away. When he saw me, his face lit up with a big smile. In Mississippi I had never seen him smile even once. He ran toward me and we embraced.

The first thing he blurted out was, “You’ll never believe it! In the last days I’ve been strongly desiring to do meditation, but couldn’t remember my mantra, lust now as I saw you, I suddenly remembered it! Thank you. thank you. thank you!”

15 Though Bindeshwari did clinically die, according to yoga it is possible that he never actually died. Yoga says that death is a process in which ultimately both the nerve cells and fibers die. There are, however, some cases in which only the nerve fibers die, but the nerve cel Is continue to live. Doctors declare that person to be clinically dead. This might have been Bindeshwari’s situation.

Baba did several times demonstrate that a person whose nerve fibers were dead but nerve cells alive could be restored to life, a phenomenon which medical science has not yet understood.

Bindeshwari had some ability to raise the consciousness of others by his touch. It is a common occult power which is accessible to advanced spiritual aspirants. Though this same occult power was displayed by Baba innumerable times, He often explained the science behind it, together with the dangers inherent in misusing the power.