DMC IN JAMALPUR JANUARY 1955

On 9 January, the day of the Dharma Maha Cakra, I reached Jamalpur with my wife.

That day for the first time I learnt gurupuja, its method and its mantra in the ashram.

That day I also saw some notices hanged on the wall, like “smoking prohibited.” I told the manager of the Ashram that he was put up this only after making me a martyr.

Had it been done earlier, I would have been saved from the punishment.

On another plate the following was written, ‘Shive Rusta Gurustrata - Guro Rushto in Kashtana’, that is, ‘If God is angry, Guru will protect, but if Guru is angry, there is no one to protect’. After reading this I mentally bowed before Baba.

When we were alone, the ashram manager told me that the evening of 5 January was time for Baba to give up His body. But He had skipped over this period by going into samadhi.

He had been explaining the philosophy of Ananda Marga. I said that it was not so easy a path as its name indicated. It was after I had said this that Baba had immediately gone into samadhi.

In the evening Baba came to the ashram and sat in the room. There we did guru puja in small groups.

After gurupuja, Baba sat on a platform in the inner verandah and the disciples sat in the courtyard. In that DMC, the subject of Baba’s discourse was ‘The Prakrti Tattva and Omkar Tattva’ (The Creative Principle and the Primordial Sound).

One did not like to miss the sight of His great personality for even a moment.

After the discourse was over, Baba gave a demonstration of Omkar Tattva and said ‘Everyone will hear this sound according to the stage of their sadhana. We all sat attentively and later on checked from each other and found that everyone had heard the sound in some form or the other.

After the discourse and the demonstration Baba blessed the gathering:

“Those who are present in this Dharma Maha Cakra either in physical body or subtle body will not be required to be born again”.

All of us were overjoyed to hear this blessing and began to cry, “Baba Ki Jai”.

Everyone was in ecstasy. After the DMC there was a collective meal. On 10 January I returned to Begusarai along with my wife.

I Take Extended Leave And Return To Jamalpur

Now it was no use for me to stay at Begusarai because I did not like my new posting.

So I decided to go on long leave.

Finally I decided to spend the period of my leave in Jamalpur at the feet of Baba. Thus decided, the very next day along with my family and bag and baggage I sent them to the village home, and myself came back to Jamalpur.

I sent for leave for a couple of months and began to stay with Bindeshwariji.

After a day or two I requested Baba for permission to go to His residence every evening, do pranam to Him and go for a walk with Him. At this Baba said ‘You will be put in trouble and I shall be moved with pity.’

I said ‘This will be a big fortunate thing for me, where is the question of trouble? And as long as I am in Jamalpur I shall not come to you requesting for pity. I just want to be with you - otherwise what attraction hasJamalpur for to.’

Baba kindly acceded to my request. Now every evening I started going to His residence and after Pranam would go for a walk with Him.

Thus every day, about 3 hours I had the good fortune to be with Baba.

I remembered that in September Baba had said that I would not be demoted unless I willed it. He had tried to persuade me otherwise and accept the flow of events in my stride. But at that time I was adamant that I should not face demotion.

In the end Baba had granted that I would get demotion only when I wanted it, and I was also happy at this.

I Realise That All Has Been Done By Baba’S Will

Time passed and I had almost forgotten that I had the boon of getting demoted only when I willed it.

Then after so many days on December 25, 1954, Baba became so angry because I smoked inside the ashram at Jamalpur.

That evening when I returned from Baba and was sitting lonely and depressed mentally offering all my near and dear things to His one by one and insisting that He may accept all of them and give me back His kind smile. After offering all these things I also offered my post and position in the end of the chain of these offerings.

As I finished this mental offering, Bindeshwariji’s elder brother had entered the room and enquired about the time. I had looked at my watch and informed him that it was five in the evening. I, therefore, recalled quite clearly that the last offering was made at 5 p.m.

That day Baba’s evening darshan was in the quarter. Aftrwards, I asked Baba what had I done to incur His displeasure?

At that time in the house I was not normal.

Thereafter on the evening of the 26th December 1954, I was given the punishment that I wrote about previously.

It turned out that my reversion order started from Delhi on December 27, 1954.

• It was issued from Patna on December 31, 1954
• I received it at Begusarai on January 3, 1955.

The government had decided to demote me in September 1954. It was recorded on the file also.

But Baba had said that after this government decision, I would get demotion at my will. Hence the gap.

Where this order was lying from September up to December end, Baba alone knows. I got it only when mentally I had offered my post and position to Him.

Did I indeed decide this of my own free will?

This question is difficult to answer.*

Perhaps circumstances so conspired that I had to will my own demotion. Here I recollect the following line of poet Vidyapati:

“It is my misfortune, no-one else is at fault”.

I find this is applicable here.