Ram, Kedar Chatterji, and Tarak

June 8, 1883

It was a summer day. The evening service in the Kali temple was over. Sri Ramakrishna stood before the image of the Divine Mother and waved the fan a few minutes.

Ram, Kedar Chatterji, and Tarak arrived from Calcutta with flowers and sweets. Kedar was about fifty years old.

At first he had frequented the Brahmo Samaj and joined other religious sects in his search for God, but later on he had accepted the Master as his spiritual guide. He was an accountant in a government office and lived in a suburb of Calcutta.

Tarak was a young man of 24. His wife had died shortly after their marriage.

He hailed from the village of Barasat not far from Calcutta. His father, a highly spiritual soul, had visited Sri Ramakrishna many times. Tarak often went to Ram’s house and used to go to Dakshineswar in the company of Ram and Nityagopal. He worked in a business firm, but his attitude toward the world was one of utter indifference.

As Sri Ramakrishna came out of the temple, he saw Ram, Kedar, M., Tarak, and other devotees standing outside. He showed his affection for Tarak by touching his chin. He was very happy to see him.

Returning to his room, the Master sat on the floor in an ecstatic mood, with his legs stretched before him.

Ram and Kedar decorated his feet with flowers and garlands. The Master was in samadhi.

Master’s exhortation to a devotee to go forward Kedar believed in certain queer practices of a religious sect to which he had once belonged. He held the Master’s big toe in his hand, believing that in this way the Master’s spiritual power would be transmitted to him.

As Sri Ramakrishna regained partial consciousness, he said, “Mother, what can he do to me by holding my toe?” Kedar sat humbly with folded hands.

Still in an ecstatic mood, the Master said to Kedar: “Your mind is still attracted by ‘woman and gold’. What is the use of saying you don’t care for it? Go forward. Beyond the forest of sandal-wood there are many more things: mines of silver, gold, diamonds, and other precious stones. Having a glimpse of spirituality, don’t think you have attained everything.”

The Master was again in an ecstatic mood. He said to the Divine Mother, “Mother, take him away.” At these words Kedar’s throat dried up.

In a frightened tone he said to Ram, “What is the Master saying?”

At the sight of Rākhāl, Sri Ramakrishna was again overpowered with a spiritual mood.

He said to his beloved disciple: “I have been here many days; When did you come?”

Was the Master hinting that he was an Incarnation of God, and Rākhāl his divine

companion, a member of the inner circle of devotees?

Sunday, June 10, 1883

The Master was sitting in his room with Rākhāl, M., Latu, Kishori, Ramlal, Hazra, and other devotees. It was about ten o’clock in the morning.

Reminiscences of boyhood

Describing his early life, Sri Ramakrishna said to them: “During my younger days the men and women of Kamarpukur were equally fond of me. They loved to hear me sing. I could imitate other people’s gestures and conversation and I used to entertain them that way. The women would put aside things for me to eat. No one distrusted me. Everybody took me in as one of the family.

“But I was like a happy pigeon. I used to frequent only happy families. I would run away from a place where I saw misery and suffering.

“One or two young boys of the village were my close friends. I was very intimate with some of them; but now they are totally immersed in worldliness. A few of them visit me here now and then and say, ‘Goodness! He seems to be just the same as he was in the village school!’ While I was at school, arithmetic would throw me into confusion, but I could paint very well and could also model small images of the deities.

“I loved to visit the free eating-places maintained for holy men and the poor, and would watch them for hours.

“I loved to hear the reading of sacred books such as the Ramayana and Bhagavata. If the readers had any affectations, I could easily imitate them and would entertain others with my mimicry.

“I understood the behaviour of women very well and imitated their words and intonations. I could easily recognize immoral women. Immoral widows part their hair in the middle and perform their toilet with great care. They have very little modesty. The way they sit is so different! But let’s not talk of worldly things any more.”

The Master asked Ramlal to sing.

Ramlal sang:

Who is this terrible Woman, dark as the sky at midnight? Who is this Woman dancing over the field of battle. Like a blue lotus that floats on a crimson sea of blood? Who is She, clad alone in the Infinite for a garment, Rolling Her three great eyes in frenzy and savage fury? Under the weight of Her tread the earth itself is trembling! Siva, Her mighty Husband, who wields the fearful trident, Lies like a lifeless corpse beneath Her conquering feet. The next song described the grief of Mandodari at the death of her husband Ravana. As he listened to it the Master shed tears of sorrow and said: “Once, when I entered the pine-grove over there, I heard the boatmen on the Ganges singing that song and wept bitterly for a long time. I had to be brought back to my room.” Ramlal sang about the love of the gopis for Sri Krishna. Akrura was about to drive Sri Krishna in a chariot from Vrindavan to Mathura. The gopis would not let Him go. Some held the wheels of the chariot; some lay down in front of it. They blamed Akrura, not knowing that Sri Krishna was leaving them of His own will. Akrura was explaining this to the gopis.

Ramlal sang:

Hold not, hold not the chariot’s wheels! Is it the wheels that make it move? The Mover of its wheels is Krishna, By whose will the worlds are moved. . . .

About the gopis, the Master said: “What deep love, what ecstatic devotion they had for Krishna!

Radha painted the picture of Sri Krishna with her own hand, but did not paint His legs lest He should run away to Mathura! I used to sing these songs very often during my boyhood. I could reproduce the whole drama from memory.” After his meal Sri Ramakrishna sat on the couch. He had not yet found time to rest. The devotees began to assemble.

One party arrived from Manirampur and another from Belgharia. Some of the devotees said, “We have disturbed your rest.”

MASTER: “Oh, no! What you say applies only to a rajasic man. About him people say, ‘Ah, now he will enjoy his sleep.’” The devotees from Manirampur asked the Master how to realize God.

MASTER: “You must practise spiritual discipline a little. It will not do simply to say that milk contains butter. You must let the milk set into curd and then churn it. Only then can you get butter from it. Spiritual aspirants must go into solitude now and then.

After acquiring love of God in solitude, they may live in the world. If one is wearing a pair of shoes, one can easily walk over thorns.

“The most important thing is faith. As is a man’s meditation, so is his feeling of love; As is a man’s feeling of love, so is his gain; And faith is the root of all. If one has faith one has nothing to fear.”